The ongoing debate about any topic you might want to select from the news these days has reached a new standard, in my assessment of, “are you kidding me?” I don’t doubt for a moment that the people involved think they’re making sense but they’re not making their arguments clearly or logically. In many instances, the “debate” has been reduced to an emotional display of nothing more than name calling. So what has this got to do with leadership within our organizations or even more importantly, our goal of protecting victims within our society? A whole lot, if we stop to think about it.
If the goal is to get changes made to existing laws to better protect victims but our arguments for doing so are confused and illogical, those who don’t want to make the changes will be able to derail the goal. The same is true for making changes within organizations.
On the other hand, if the arguments for making changes to the laws are well reasoned, logical, and based on verified facts, those individuals who oppose the goal will be less able to undermine it. Again, the same is true for an organization seeking to make changes in process, policies, procedures, etc.
It’s important to remember that it’s not about how something appears. Rather, it is the underlying foundation upon which the goal is based. Base the goal figuratively on cotton candy, and the first hint of any moisture will melt the foundation in a New York second. Base the goal on a solid foundation of reason and verified fact, and no amount of argument will undermine it.
Long term solutions
Empower the Victim
I recently watched a February 2018 Royal Foundation Forum involving Prince William, the Duchess of Cambridge, Prince Harry, and Meghan Markle. In the forum, as well as in other venues, a spotlight was put on mental health issues within the UK. Good for them! Their addressing this very important topic will not only help folks in the UK but will, hopefully, also shine the spotlight on mental health issues throughout the world, including the U.S. I thank them for taking this important first step.
The now Duchess of Sussex mentioned that her focus will be on empowering women. A good focus, but I ask that she consider broadening her view. Efforts should made to empower victims of crime, especially victims of sexual assault, molestation, and abuse. Here in the U.S., earlier this year we had our hearts broken as more than 150 young women and girls bared their souls and described the particularly vile and heinous conduct of Larry Nassar. Not only did they shine the spotlight on him but they also pointed a relentless light on the conduct of those who had the responsibility to stop him decades before he was finally stopped.
Now imagine if all of us stood with all the victims of crime, young, old and in-between, standing shoulder to shoulder with them as they travel the very difficult journey of not only coping with the harm but also working to reestablish their sense of self, sense of security, and recognizing that they still have value. Imagine how the young Royals with their “Heads Together” campaign can impact the world’s view of victims as they struggle with episodes of PTSD, thoughts of suicide, and attempting to live a “normal” life as spouse, parent, sibling, etc. Imagine a campaign where victims of crime are empowered with no judgments made. Imagine being that shoulder of support and encouragement for someone who so desperately needs to be heard.
What if we really and truly did attempt to do what the Most Reverend Bishop Michael Curry suggested – harness the power of love for one another, especially those within our families and neighborhoods who have lost their love for themselves as a result of being victimized by criminal acts? Imagine the world we’d have where we help victims find within themselves the strength to effectively regain their sense of self-worth.
But it’s not enough to just imagine. Now is the time to begin the hard work. Let’s do it together.
Problem Solving – The “Whack A Mole”© Method
Ever watch young kids try the arcade game where they hammer the moles into oblivion? As the game progresses, they hammer the moles harder and harder. The older kids quickly realize that no matter how hard they hit the moles, another one is going to pop up. They generally walk away, refusing to play anymore. Ahem, leaders and supervisors – a lesson to take to heart?
Simply addressing the symptoms of an issue within your organization is not going to result in any meaningful solution to your problems. And if you keep doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different outcome, you’ve just succeeded in demonstrating Einstein’s definition of insanity.
A key component to problem solving is the correct and accurate identification of the cause of the problem. But I think that’s the issue. Identification of the underlying issue seems so simple at first. When the identification doesn’t come easily, the tendency is to revert to looking at the symptoms because they’re more obvious and easier to address. Address the symptom, hammer another mole and problem solved. NO! Symptom addressed.
Here’s a practical suggestion: Put the hammer down. Sit down, take a deep breath, and get a plan together. Put together a quality work team to begin the problem solving stage. Talk with AND LISTEN to the people involved in the problem situation and those who have experience handling such issues. After collecting information, work together to develop quality responses. Communicate with the people involved in the situation, as well as the entire organization. Decide on your best solution and implement it. Use the evaluation phase to assess how well the solution is working. If it’s working, great! If not, make the necessary changes to either fix the implemented solution or toss it out and implement one of the other solutions developed previously. It’s hard work but worth the effort. And if you want to pick up the hammer and whack something, take your kids to the arcade and see how many moles you can whack.
Let’s Ignore the Cabal in Criminal Justice
I have watched with increasing concern, the behavior of some folks who have sworn to uphold the laws and the Constitution. Seems we have a cabal of individuals who believe that certain people are to be treated more fairly than others. A privileged class of individuals has grown who flagrantly violate the law – the same law that others without political power or money are prosecuted under and are often sentenced to prison when convicted.
Why am I worried about what some would call “old news?” A couple of reasons. First, I’m very proud of our Criminal Justice System (“CJS”) in this country. It’s not perfect but I know that we have dedicated folks who are passionate about insuring that changes are made so that we can achieve the fair and impartial administration of justice. These individuals should not have their efforts tarred with the self-serving conduct of others who support a privileged class of select citizens.
More importantly, with the cabal in place dominating the headlines, time, and effort, those of us looking for meaningful changes in the way in which victims are protected and served throughout the entire CJS will be stymied.
Getting laws passed is the least of our concerns – fair and impartial enforcement is the most important concern. Prosecutors who pick and choose who to prosecute based upon status and perceived political power; judges who consider the future of the offender over the rights of victims; or, universities and colleges which decline to press for criminal prosecution for a campus rape, continue to threaten our efforts to implement change. Members of the CJS who work daily to insure the fair and impartial administration of justice are the folks which should be grabbing the headlines. Indeed, their efforts and passion about protecting the rights of victims should be fully acknowledged and recognized. Shine the spotlight on these dedicated folks, and let’s ignore the cabal.
Breaking in a New Cold Front
Family and friends living on the east coast – you’re welcome!
It’s been chilly of late here in the southwest desert. If you don’t believe me, take a look at the photo taken late last week at about five in the morning.
I don’t know about anyone else but it’s a bit strange that the Phoenix area would set records for high temperatures in January and the week before MLB’s spring training starts, we’re colder than a number of places east of us. Now there could any number of ways to handle such an event. We could complain mightily, wrap ourselves in every single layer of clothing we own and top that off with a new pair of flip flops (another story for another time), or simply go with the flow. I no longer own a serious winter coat and haven’t seen my good winter gloves in over a decade. It’s a shock to the system to get the pups up and out around five in the morning only to see the temperature is well below the mandatory minimum 60 degrees. The three looks of, “seriously, Mom? It’s freezing out here,” are priceless but Mom prevails.
This cold snap might help explain why I never complain about the triple digit weather we experience here throughout an extended summer. I guess I’ve finally reached that point in my life where I know there are simply things over which I have no control, the weather being one of them. That doesn’t mean I simply give up. With this cold snap (hopefully done by the weekend) I can’t control how cold it is but I can control my response. Fussing isn’t going to change a thing and complaining to folks who are well below zero and still shoveling snow is sort of like spitting into the wind – another waste of time and often inconsiderate to boot.
I know that the task I took on late last summer is something that contains a number of things I can’t control. What I can control is my passion and my commitment to making a positive change, even if it’s only in the lives of the three young boys I met over two years ago. And if we all work together, each of us can make a similar change in the lives of any number of young people whose lives have been seriously impacted by neglect and abuse. Do I know for certain that the weather’s going to change? Yup. Do I know for certain that I’m going to make a positive difference in someone’s life? Not really, but that uncertainty isn’t going to stop me from trying.
Moving Forward
It was gratifying to watch as Larry Nassar was sentenced in the latest of his court cases to a minimum of 40 years and a maximum of 125 years, concurrent to the sentence imposed by Judge Aquilina and consecutive to the federal sentence of 60 years. The question now looming over this situation is how do we move forward from this point?
First and foremost, we must make sure that the victims of Nassar’s criminal conduct are supported as they begin or continue the healing process. I understand from the sentencing hearings that restitution is still open and will be decided at an upcoming court hearing. Restitution will address the victims’ needs for therapy or continued medical care.
Second, as leaders within our organizations and communities, we must work with legislators, law enforcement, and courts to insure that the laws are complied with by all organizations. The conduct of MSU, and USA Gymnastics enabled Nassar’s criminal conduct to continue for over two decades. Had the officials who were originally told of his conduct in the mid-1990s fulfilled their responsibilities with due diligence, scores of young girls and women would never have been exposed to the horrors of sexual assault. We must insure that not only are the offenders held accountable but that those who enable the offenders are also held to account.
And finally, we must work together to insure that our communities are safe for all residents. People of all ages and genders must have the confidence that when they legitimately report that they have been sexually assaulted, law enforcement will act responsibly upon that information, in full compliance with the laws. Where the laws are weak or ineffective, we must insure that new laws are passed and upheld. When victims are found, we must do all in our power to insure that they are made whole again. To do nothing is not an option.
Ignorance Versus Compassion and Understanding
While watching the sentencing hearings for Larry Nassar, I took an opportunity to also watch the hearings on social media, reading many of the comments which folks posted. I was struck on many occasions by the complete lack of compassion and understanding expressed in some comments. A disturbing trend were comments to the effect that somehow, the victims of Nassar’s criminal conduct lost any right to pursue justice because they failed to speak up in a timely manner. What appears to have been lost on those observers was any understanding or appreciation for a victim’s response when sexually assaulted. To all those individuals who believe that none of the victims had any right to speak because they did not speak up previously, a brief lesson in compassion is now offered.
How can we expect victims of sexual assault to speak up when, in this specific case, those who bravely did so in the mid-1990s were intimidated and coerced into silence? What exactly is expected from a six-year old victim of sexual assault? What about a nine-year old victim? What about a fifteen-year old teenager who is assaulted by someone she has been conditioned to trust implicitly?
For those who believe the victims are somehow at fault for not reporting the conduct, I respectfully recommend that you talk with any victim advocate, especially those who deal with young child victims on an almost daily basis. That victim advocate will tell us that we can’t undo the harm that was done. But once we learn what has happened, we owe each and every victim our compassion and our understanding. As responsible adults we also owe the victims a restoration of their sense of security – that we will do all that we can to insure no further harm is done. Let’s stop the rush to judgment and instead, start creating a society where our children are no longer at risk from sexual predators and others who seek to do them harm. We can do no less.
A Season of Giving
In the past week or so there have been news stories about school administrators’ efforts to basically outlaw any celebration of Christmas on both primary and secondary school campuses. In my assessment this effort is totally misguided and driven by a continuing effort to demean and degrade one of the world’s major religions.
Just this week I got the chance to surprise my daughter-in-law for her birthday. The surprise was complete because I have a steadfast rule of not traveling back east when the frozen white stuff is falling or there’s a possibility of it falling – and my mandatory minimum temperature has to be above 60 degrees. But seeing the joy in her eyes made it all worthwhile. This week reminded me of the special moments untold numbers of folks are preparing to share with loved ones. It’s the quality of time that will be shared with family and friends and the loving memories which will make this season special. More than material goods, time is the most precious gift we can give one another. At this time of year, the gift Christians were given over 2,000 years ago is not lost on folks once we get past the commercialism and think about the true meaning of this season.
My commentary is not an invitation to those who seek to trash Christianity to continue their efforts. Rather, it’s an invitation to stop denigrating and, instead, seek to understand and appreciate. Engage in a conversation where emotional correctness and active listening are used. And try to remember that true people of faith are seeking ways in which to have a meaningful and fulfilling relationship with their God while practicing real tolerance and love for their neighbor. Don’t be surprised if that honest conversation leads everyone to learn that we have more in common than we have different. From that common point we can all work together to find realistic solutions to the problems which continue to bedevil us all. And we can give one another the most precious gift of all – time spent together as friends, neighbors, and family.
CHANGE – Friend or foe?
I’ve been looking at any number of organizations which are currently undergoing change. Despite all the research, change is still seen as something very negative and implementing change remains a difficult mountain to climb. Why is that?
Let’s be honest. Change causes anxiety. Will I get to keep my job? Am I still a valued member of the organization?
There are any number of organizations which implement change smoothly, with little to no disruption to the productivity and job satisfaction. What do they do that works?
Probably the key thing is communication. When a change is being considered, leaders within the organization need to let the staff know what’s going on. Leaving it to the rumor mill is a surefire way to creating dissatisfaction. Ask the staff for their thoughts on how best to implement the change. Use the experience within the staff to quickly identify potential problem areas and have the staff work with management to develop realistic solutions to those problems should they develop.
Another key is making sure that the staff is provided with opportunities for training in the new way of doing things. This can help insure that the staff gets the training they need which prepares them for the new way of doing things, but it also sends an important message – they are considered valued assets to the organization. When downsizing has to occur, the organization can take a very positive step by insuring that resources and retraining are available to help people expand their skill sets and find employment in other areas. Simply letting folks go with the attitude of “don’t let the door hit you as you leave” paints the organization in a very negative light, one which is not easily countered. Word of mouth will insure that quality recruits will take a second look at an organization that doesn’t value its staff.
Change might not be our friend but we need to make sure we’re not turning it into an unbeatable foe, either.
It doesn’t take a crisis
In a recent discussion, folks expressed their belief that it was sad that it took the crisis of Harvey to have folks do nice things for others. I’m sorry – I have to completely disagree.
Good people, kind-hearted people don’t wait for a crisis to help others. With or without a crisis, not a day goes by in this country without folks getting involved in trying to make life a bit easier for their neighbors. The difference is that they don’t broadcast what they’re doing. They’re simply doing it because it’s the right thing to do. They’re doing it because three little boys need a loving home and people to help them learn that childhood is not about being abused or locked away in the dark. They’re doing it because some young people made a poor decision which landed them on the wrong side of the law and they don’t want to see those lives thrown away, nor the lives of the rescued pups the young people are training with. They’re doing it because of their love for teaching and wanting to see young people learn the importance of art and music in expanding their minds. Race, color, gender, and all those other labels folks use to try to separate us don’t matter. Good people help folks simply because it’s the right thing to do.
The devastation from Harvey and Irma will pass. But the kindness shared between strangers will live on in the hearts of those receiving and giving those kindnesses. What lesson can we learn from Mother Nature’s latest show? All of us are affected by the devastation. But we also know that a better day is coming and we all will have yet another opportunity to share a kindness with strangers.